Last night in Tobago.

An evening on the balcony,

listening to the sounds of paradise.

I delved into consciousness, to witness

Her higher truth; soul, other, lover, queen.

Only in meditation can I get the truth

Of where my beloved resides.

I search in vain the twitter,

But the partner of my soul,

Can only be found in the sacred spaces

Of the true essence of my heart.

What is on the outer,

first most come from within.

So I will go with love

On my inner journey home.

(with thanks to A.A.Almaas & the beloved)

Tobagon tide

Beyond my wishes I was called to swim naked,

To dive new born into the Ocean of Atlantis.

Last night, the leatherback gave birth

Out of her natural buoyant self

She landed on her birthing beach,

An amazing turtle, true mother earth returned,

Leaving her eggs, at Easter, for newfound hope.

That they might hatch, allowed to live,

Is all that separates us from extinction.

And now the rains return, a tropical shower

That blesses this paradisal isle,

This land of happiness & joy,

That feels so foreign to my wounded pride,

That I may have another truly understand,

And with that love, the soul I truly am.

Newfound hope

Tomorrow I wake a new man.

The dream has, after much soul searching

Granted me a balm. Where once I was the victim,

Now I see the greater plan. Or at least sense it

In the vision of my other. my beloved.

I may never meet again the sweetheart

That visited me tonight, yet that no longer matters,

Though I would always wish it more I did.

Instead I am freed to be myself,

To live with hope, that I may give such radiance

In life, in healing, to others in need

As I have seen in the gorgeousness of the goddess

Who as awoken in my heart tonight.

23.4.11

Easter Saturday in Tobago, struggling with loss of the beloved.

Every morning I bring roses to your grave,

And slowly, day by day,

build a shrine to your memory.

In mourning the life we once had

It is not only the mother who has passed,

But also my favourite daughter

Taken before her time.

The father in me, who promised,

Never to abandon & hold sacred his dearest love

is forced against his Will to let go, forsake

His most beloved child to Fate.

It is the one promise I swore never to break, broken.

For a kindly loving soul, from a place of light

This human life is too cruel to bear,

And I will not mourn it when it passes.

'I am holding space for you'

you whisper from behind the veil,

and from deep within my well of anguished tears,

"I am holding time for you, my dearest love"

Is all I can reply.